Joel was born sleeping aged 40 weeks exactly. His due date. His birth date. His death date.
My views, my expectations, my social circle and my family have all irrevocably changed since we lost Joel. I went home from hospital that October armed with information. Booklets, hospital leaflets and legal information falling out of my arms. I was sure the answers were going to be contained within this pile of knowledge. I would be ok and I would get through this. WE would get through this.
But time carried on, as it does. The information we received that day didn’t cover “the rest of my life”... it didn’t even cover the weeks after the funeral. But my grief was still new at this point. I was still unsure who I was now and how I would get through the next days, weeks, months, years carrying this impossible weight. I was left to my own devices to figure this new world out.
I decided I wanted to use my experience to help other people who find themselves on this journey of loss. I was lucky enough to be able to meet with the Head of Midwifery at Chesterfield Royal Hospital, Linda Gustard. I told her my story; she listened as I spoke about the experiences of leaving hospital and the time which followed. Together we worked on the idea to create this book
- Sarah Nelson